someone to take the kid away
this is jenny; my blog name is appearing
instead of mine. can anyone change it?
about parenting.
about the blog.
somehow i am not able to write anything serious.
today i spend the whole day with my daughter.
i am a stay-at-home mother
and together we cooked and cleaned
and talked...then it started to rain.
so together we watched the rain.
and i told her stories from alice in wonderland
it makes her so happy that she literally
screams as alice grows and shrinks.
after evenign, my parents came and babu
came and i am comparitively free.
this is one thing i want to say about parenting.
there shoudl be some back up, someone to
come and take the kid away.
other wise things cannot work out.
would anyone like to talk about this?
bye
posted by thirty six j @ 9:13 PM
7 Comments:
But that photo in jenny's album......holding Faizy with a caption "pennezhuthu" defines it all......is n't that wonderful? If somebody takes Faizy away for sometime...and relieves jenny for a while.....I think there is obviosly a difference....Would nt that affect your writing too? But how .....? That you have to explain.!!!!!
u think i write because i am holding faizy???!!!
through that photo all i wanted to say is that i write inspite of her.
this does not mean that she has no effect on me. but this kind of romanticization is too bad.
just imagine yourself in my situation -
what i understood from Prasad's comment is that holding Faizy is the act of writing for the mother, in other words, it says Jenny is deprived of time and space to write since she has to save another life(which is seen as her own responsibility)...and i found it interesting and strong statement.
And about the situation...
I would like to change this framework of mother having prior responsibility and others just helping.
y can't mother be helpind and somebody else having the prior responsibility.
y can't mother's responsibility be taken as full in her preparation of milk for the baby.It's a psychological and physical effort or care given for the child.
And it's important mother feel free to live while breastfeeding.
if she is burdened with the prior responsibility it effects the child too.
so let me put it this way...why can't somebody else take care of Faizy completely and let her enjoy Jenny's presence when Jenny herself is completely in it?
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
I think there is a terrible misunderstanding!! I was infact trying to problematize the significations unleashed from that iconic photo....if i may put it that way....and for god's sake not to romanticize!!Probably I was a bit ambiguous....Nobody would be able to write the writing that jenny is writing ....when the other inseparable sign is moved away for a while ...!!I can neither imagine in your place nor can I write the writing you are writing... jenny...!! Think I am unambiguosly clear.....my apologies if it caused a misunderstanding!!!Thanks to sreejitha for making it too Clear!!
i think i did misunderstand prasad. i thought he was saying that wihtout faizy i cannot write. sorry for misunderstanding. though i still have not fully got what you were saying, or what sreejitha is saying in trying to make it clear.
about sree's other comments:
>I would like to change this >framework of mother having prior >responsibility and others just >helping.
>y can't mother be helpind and >somebody else having the prior >responsibility.
i agree with this.
this is the real radical need.
actually i never said mother or anythning in my post =
and moreover, whoever it is, even that person who takes primnary responsibility needs a break from the chld. especially in nuclear situations like ours.
ideally the best situation would be to live as communities and do away with the kind of stressful parenting we do - but that is not what is available to many of us.
what about the significance of the problem highlighted?
isn't it high time we should think of making all those involved in the caretaking roles equally responsible, and free the mother from the evergiven privilege of the prior caretaker? It is suffocating for either of the parents to be the full time caretaker and mothers have the additional burden of traditional expectations, and it will be injustice to let a person fight against the norms and take care of somebody at a time.
I think we will have to rethink our daily activities each day and take this very serious.
The worst thing is we don't (I know about Jenny's and my family)want to rely upon our parents or any other "normal" parental figures to bring the child up because of their treatment of the child as an object. So we (those who are reliable) will have to sit together, talk and decide... the entire job might be tiring, might consume most of the time and energy, still... it's necessary, and let us each unit share the way we solve things.
Post a Comment
<< Home